摘要
l
在親密關係的脈絡下,涂爾幹提醒我們思考個人旨趣與社會義務之間的關係。個人發展與集體連帶,以及兩者之間相互強化的關係,是親密關係理論的核心關懷。
l 社會約束力逐漸不再像過去那麼穩固,個人的自我實現在我們這個時代越木人人越重要。
關於個人發展與集體相處的相關文獻
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涂爾幹《社會分工論》以及,Riesman’s The Lonely Crowd (2001) to, more recently,
Bellah et al.’s Habits
of the Heart (1985) and Wuthnow’s Acts of Compassion (1991) and Putnam’s Bowling Alone (2000). 涂爾幹的提問:What happens to communal ties as individualism in its
many forms progresses? Does society become increasingly fragmented and
self-interested or does it retain some common cohesiveness, and how so?
親密關係理論的四個階段
1.
當代親密關與治療型文化的角色(1970s-1980s)
[專家介入「治療」人們的日常生活]
2.
透過家庭社會學觀看親密關係(1980s-1990s的討論)
[美國個體化婚姻的發展趨勢]
3.
歐洲視角看親密關係:制度的個體化與反身性
[Bauman流動之愛;紀登斯、貝克等人的討論]
4.
親密關係與性別的問題
[親密關係的預設,從性別基模漸漸轉變成平等式或審議式的協商]
當代親密關係的文化為:「(1) emphasis on self-disclosure and mutual understanding between
romantic partners; (2) grounding in personalized ideologies of self-development
and other therapeutic ideals; and (3) expanded consciousness of individual
rights and ideals of gender egalitarianism in relationships.」(1210)
結論(頁1213-1214):
個體崇拜處於更新或轉型的過程中。有兩個方式可以思考這個問題。
1. 從涂爾幹的角度來思考,當代的個體主義,不只作為社會差異(social difference)的源頭,也作為相聚(togetherness)的源頭。Such a move was already
under way in Cancian’s 1980s and Giddens’s 1990s work on intimacy; Bellah’s
earlier work also outlined models of more and less socially integrative individualisms.
Giddens’s theory of individualized commitment in contemporary relationships
seems a useful kind of ‘third way’ framework for imagining individually internalized devotion to a collective good (Lichterman, 1995) in intimacy. The type
of intimate solidarity envisioned by Giddens allows women and men to
internalize, in a self-enriching manner, obligations toward a romantic other. (換言之,當浪漫愛突破了封建愛,匯流愛是雙方都對彼此內化了浪漫愛,而從不顧一切的愛情,轉變成為顧及他人的愛情)。對紀登斯來說,民主地協調親密關係,意味著伴侶間必須透過「能調整修正的對伴侶及關係之承諾(commitment)來平衡個體之間的自由與自律。(權利義務相伴,但可修改協商)→但這個論點的規範性意味太重(你們應該如何如何…)有點說教的感覺。
2. 或者,有必要對當代親密關係進行拓展性的研究,以便含入對親密關係地景的多面向思考。像是婚姻或同居關係,可以納入諸如風險、社會不安、治療型論述/意識形態,以及想當然爾的親密關係的理性化。這些概念在理論上重要,但在經驗上卻是研究較少的。性別與家庭學者已經作了一些研究,不過多是關於關係中個體性的性別模型,較少從理性化、反身性或其他新的社會力量的思考。
當代理論已不再視自我實現與公共參與為互斥的二分選擇。A way ‘out of the box’
appears to lie in a cautiously optimistic vision of contemporary intimacy: as
fostering egalitarian, democratic and
individually fulfilling bonds while engendering durable connections between romantic partners and to society more
generally。